Thursday, December 30, 2010
Thinking too much
So this thought is rolling thru my head tonight. A simple thought and yet, at the same time, it is a question I am unable to really answer well. Other than the simple "text book/Sunday school" answer.
I have a friend that I have known since about the 6th grade. He has prior memories of me but I do not of him. This friend, in a way, gave up several years of his life for me. Obviously not literally but he allowed me, being an obnoxious jr higher and about 5 years younger, to tag along just about everywhere with him. We went to church, snowboarding and put the hurt on just about every all-you-can-eat buffet in Spokane on a regular basis. Especially JB's for the all-you-can-eat Sunday bar they used to have. If it were not for this person in my life I am fairly certain I would not be who I am now, and would very possibly be "singing in the quire of the undead" by now. (Sorry for the constant barrage of movie quotes :-)) I would do anything within my power for that man.
Why is it then that I struggle daily doing the things that would please the one who literally gave up everything for me? The one who suffered and died to cover the blood penalty owed for my sin.
One might think it a simple thing at first. However, the simple facts are that we have an enemy. An enemy who is a wise and sneaky pest that desires our ultimate destruction. That and we are born with this sin nature. This selfishness within that desires more to make sure "I" am taken care of and get what "I" want more than to please my savior.
Our world tells us to compromise. That there must be middle ground where "we can all just get along". This is not what our Lord has called us to. He has called us to be set apart for His glory. To be in this world as a light that all may see and know He is God. There is no middle ground there can be no compromise. There is one way to God, thru Jesus Christ the risen and only Son of He who created us from the dust of the earth and formed us in the womb or our mothers. May we daily seek Him and strive to make our Father proud to call us sons and daughters. That we may make known and lift high the name of Christ and His kingdom.
oh to hear those words upon our arrival home when we finally get there... "well done good and faithful servant". For this I am not worthy but oh that I may be counted among the faithful.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
baby it's cold outside
I wake up and it's dark but I still have to check the time as it doesn't start getting light til about 945am.
I walk outside and find it hard to breath, often coughing as the cold dry air hits my lungs.
I warm up my truck for 30 minutes then drive home and the hood is still frosted over, it's -35 degrees Fahrenheit tonight.
Welcome to Fairbanks Alaska in the winter.
I am constantly reassured that this is not normal. Usual the really cold weather doesn't come until Jan or Feb. Great!!!, I think to myself, that's encouraging. It's gonna get even colder. The locals say this isn't bad. They don't like it and ya never get used to it. However, there are plenty who love it here. All I can figure is the summers must really be amazing, in spite of the need for a head net. A head net you ask.... yes, a head net. Not for sanitary reasons in the kitchen, so the no-see-ems and mosquito's don't eat you alive.
I got myself a warm coat and pants to wear over my work clothes for the walk from the back of the store where we park. It's only a couple hundred yards but your pants will almost freeze solid in the time it takes to walk that far. Why, you ask, do we have to park so far away. That's where the plug ins are. Yes, plugs ins for your vehicle. There are three heaters added to my truck. One for the engine, transmission and battery. All to make sure the truck starts when you turn the key. Today, it was barely enough!
It is beautiful here and I found a great little church. It's about 200 people I think including children. Which, believe it or not, is about 1/3 of the congregation. Not teenagers down, youngsters! Like under 10. I think the avg family has at least 4. It's a little crazy but kinda fun too. There are some great folks and lots of knowledge as well. I really appreciate being able to listen to men who have obviously done there homework. Since I'm not a great researcher/studier, it is a great way for me to learn.
I walk outside and find it hard to breath, often coughing as the cold dry air hits my lungs.
I warm up my truck for 30 minutes then drive home and the hood is still frosted over, it's -35 degrees Fahrenheit tonight.
Welcome to Fairbanks Alaska in the winter.
I am constantly reassured that this is not normal. Usual the really cold weather doesn't come until Jan or Feb. Great!!!, I think to myself, that's encouraging. It's gonna get even colder. The locals say this isn't bad. They don't like it and ya never get used to it. However, there are plenty who love it here. All I can figure is the summers must really be amazing, in spite of the need for a head net. A head net you ask.... yes, a head net. Not for sanitary reasons in the kitchen, so the no-see-ems and mosquito's don't eat you alive.
I got myself a warm coat and pants to wear over my work clothes for the walk from the back of the store where we park. It's only a couple hundred yards but your pants will almost freeze solid in the time it takes to walk that far. Why, you ask, do we have to park so far away. That's where the plug ins are. Yes, plugs ins for your vehicle. There are three heaters added to my truck. One for the engine, transmission and battery. All to make sure the truck starts when you turn the key. Today, it was barely enough!
It is beautiful here and I found a great little church. It's about 200 people I think including children. Which, believe it or not, is about 1/3 of the congregation. Not teenagers down, youngsters! Like under 10. I think the avg family has at least 4. It's a little crazy but kinda fun too. There are some great folks and lots of knowledge as well. I really appreciate being able to listen to men who have obviously done there homework. Since I'm not a great researcher/studier, it is a great way for me to learn.
Tuesday, November 16, 2010
the "HEART" of the matter....
I've been "accused" (I use that term for lack of a better one)of wearing my emotions on my sleeve and tonight I am definitely emotional. The last year for me has been an emotional roller coaster of epic proportions. This move is only adding to it all.
It took me way to long in life to really understand the true value of friends and even more so family. Now I lay here the night before another move that will again take me away from everything I have ever known and all I care about. I do well to hide it most of the time. However, the truth is... I'm tired of it. I do believe that the Lord has good plans for me and I trust Him or I wouldn't be going. At some point it would be nice to stay somewhere, build solid friendships and Lord willing a family of my own.
To this point I have done well but it has taken much effort to not ball like a baby. Now writing, I'm on the verge.
So what is the heart of the matter anyway. It is the heart. It is not about the move, the friends, the job or even family. It is about my heart and the simple fact that God wants all of it. He knows what is best for me. That being that which will draw me closer to Him. The creator of the Universe knows me fully and wants to be known by me and to be loved by me.
Lord help me see this move with your eyes. With an attitude of surrender and a desire to seek you in it. To learn what you would have me learn, lead where you would have me lead and follow where you would have me follow.
Grant me Your peace that passes all understanding, and/or lack there of, and make me fully dependent upon You and You alone. That my heart, soul, strength and mind would be fully surrendered to You.
Monday, November 8, 2010
notes from the drive...
I just got back from my trip to Colorado Springs. It was a beautiful drive and I heard some great stuff on the radio. Here are some notes of what stood out to me.
For starters, I am not a Browns fan but they did woop up on the Patriots yesterday. The Raiders and Chiefs played yesterday, and the game mattered. They are the top two teams in the division for the first time in years!!! Wish I could have watched that one.
I heard a sermon on the way over from a pastor in Seattle. He was talking about our lists. We have lists of what we want to do and accomplish as well as the perfect mate, who we want to marry. He used Boaz as an example for this and it was pretty interesting. What must Boaz's list have looked like. Poor homely looking looking widow standing in the welfare line. I don't think that is what he was looking for. He noticed her heart, that it was for her family and for God. She was a woman of integrity and who was willing to do what was necessary to survive and take care of her family. Boaz accepted who God put in front of Him and loved her with everything he was and had.
The one I heard this morning on the home stretch was good also. He was talking about Paul and the "thorn in his flesh". Paul said it was given to him so that he would not become conceited. God is more concerned with our growth and ability to serve Him than our happiness. He wants us to become who He has created us to be. It is not that He doesn't want us to be happy but it is not His first concern. How long did He let the Israelite's wonder in the desert? More importantly, why? Why, because He wanted their obedience, their trust and their love. It took so long because they were stubborn, just like us :-\
Lord take me thru what you must to make me who you want me to be. Lord, let me be a FAST learner :-)
Monday, November 1, 2010
how must God feel.....
God created us in His image. He loves us unconditionally to the point of sending His son to die on the cross for our sins.
How must God feel....
Most of us have felt loved in our lives. Love of a friend or spouse, the love of our parents or hopefully one at least. The love of our grandparents or nieces and nephews or a boy/girl friend. Most of us have felt love for another as well most likely one listed above.
How must God feel....
We all know that feeling when our heart aches to be near someone. When you long to hear their voice, see the smile on their face and even stare into those beautiful eyes. To play a game of cards, toss a frisbee or watch a sunset together.
How must God feel....
Most of us at one time or another have felt like we would do anything for someone. We'd get a haircut, shave or even move across the country maybe even to the other side of the world for that certain someone. Like you'd walk 500 miles just to see them or swim an ocean just to give them a hug. We'll go on a diet or start exercising more just to try and be who they want.
How must God feel....
What would you do? How would you feel? If the one who was fully meant to be with you and for you set you aside for something else. The one you know to be your soul-mate left you for greener grass.
How must God feel....
We are that one. Created by God to be with Him. Without question the one He longs to be with. He wants to hear your voice and for you to hear His. Do you listen? Do you hear? He loves us more than we are capable of understanding and what.... we offer Him a little time each morning and Sunday before the games start?
How would you feel? Not that any of us is even close to understanding His love or perspective, but ponder it with me if you will.
How must God feel to be rejected by those He created and loves? Whom He has known from before time and set aside His love for each of us. His patience never ending His sadness...is it ever growing? Caused by our continued rebellion, discarding Him like just another thing to do? Or someone that we know will be there, IF we need Him?
How must God feel....
Oh that we would know His love lavished upon us daily. If we knew just a bit of how He loves us, would we change? Would we step out and begin letting Him transform us to who He would have us be? He does love us, he loves you. Do you trust Him? Will you trust Him? Will you walk and talk with Him on the good days and bad? Will you let Him be your all so that He can show you His all for you?
Lord that I would be your servant, child, target of affection and recipient of your grace and mercy. Show me more of you and draw me near Lord God change me from the inside that I may glorify your name. That the Name of Jesus the Christ would be my constant companion and visible in glory to those around me and each of us.
Saturday, October 30, 2010
life in general- continued from "life as I've seen it"
Added Saturday 10-30-2010
I remember learning to snow ski in a park with rental gear. My mom, older bro and sis were all there and it was fun. We went to MT Spokane for our first day on a mtn. I think my brother and I ditched out on lessons. They were just too slow and we were good. Good enough anyway. I switched to snowboarding in jr high as I started going to the mtn with my friend Dave. To say that we went often, would be an understatement. We had season passes most years and put them to good use. So much that the lift operators all knew us. We were also fast enough that on some lifts they would time us coming down. Those were the day, right up until that fateful day. It was at golf course of all places when I destroyed my knee. The drop from the second tee box to the fairway is about 50 feet and flat at the bottom. You get the picture, and if not, try jumping from the 5th floor of the nearest building. No, not really I wouldn’t recommend that.
When it wasn’t ski season I was outside doing something. I shot hoops for hours and then learned to rock-climb. Or rather learned to use ropes and climb harder stuff safely. I was hooked immediately. I started climbing 5-6 days a week among my other hobbies. A typical day may have looked something like this. With an early start for weight training at 6am, finish class about 1130 then ride my mtn bike to the climbing area. Which also happened to be, a fun riding spot. Ditch the climbing gear ride to the top and fly back down. A round or two of that before I set a rope up and wait for Ken to arrive. We’d climb til our arms hurt and then part ways. At which point I would I would ride one of two directions. West to downtown if I had to work or there was a pool tourney or E to my dads house where the river and ski boated waited. If I went skiing I would normally end up playing pool after anyhow. So we’ll go that way. Work was 6-midnight or 2 am normally. Pool nights I was usually out til 3as they closed around 2 and we often went for food after. On some nights we would go bowling and on those nights and late work nights I’d be up til 430ish. Then back to school by 6. Saturdays, oh gosh, Saturdays were hard. About 3 a month I had to work long shifts. This meant starting at7am and going til close. This was anywhere from midnight to 4am again. Needless to say, I didn’t sleep much, except in chemistry class.
Throw in golf, wrestling, football, shooting, hunting and all the other stuff I mentioned earlier and this was me. Rather what I did, all the time. I have in the last couple years eliminated several hobbies/activities and may be knocking a couple more off my list soon as well.
Enough of this randomness….
before "the blog"- life as I've seen it- from 6-4-2010
Life from my perspective
To write or not to write, that is my question. Well, my first question but an easy one I suppose as I have already begun, Maybe the real question is what to write… or, even better yet and more accurate, where to start. I have written a few things here and there before but nothing serious, not that this will be, that is yet to be seen, “ya just never know what you’re gonna get” when I start writing. I was sparked you might say to begin writing that which comes to me so here I am this am just writing what comes out but I have a few thoughts so we’ll see where they lead.
Here they are in no specific order and I’ll add to them as the thoughts come out so if you choose to continue, please bare with me.
My eye has seen; what I know; what I believe….
My eye has seen: many things some would say and yet I feel there is so much still to see and learn but I’ll focus on what I have seen. What makes Jeffrey Allen Wieber who he is, who I am?
What I know: I know that God is in control and has a plan for my life. I can trust Him yet I’m not sure I understand “how”
What I believe: What I have seen and what I know do not add up. You see I use a very practical method to come to my conclusions. 1+1=2 right?! If I see someone jump off of a bridge they are either stupid, suicidal or just having fun and it’s totally safe. If there is water I can easily rule out suicidal then it is just a matter of whether or not they resurface smiling or bleeding as to whether they are brilliant or not so much. Maybe a bit warped, but this is my brain after 32 years of this “so called life”
OK, back to the start…
My eyes have seen… again, where to begin. Marriage, it can be an amazing thing where two people choose life together and follow through on that commitment. Most say in their vows “thru good and bad, sickness and health” or something like that right. However, that in most cases just isn’t what takes place. The bad comes along and everyone forgets commitments cause this isn’t what they thought bad would look like. Guess what folks, bad usually isn’t good. In fact, it often royally sucks! It’s life deal with it and keep going. Now, don’t get me wrong here. I fully believe there are times when divorce is necessary but I think it is a lot less than 55% of the time. Maybe 5-10% but even that is probably too much. I mean I’ve heard of people changes their vows to “as long as love shall last” instead of “until death do us part”. Well that sets ya up for success doesn’t it. Since love is a decision that has to be made, usually daily, then those folks don’t even really intend to stay together in my estimation, but hey what do I know. There have only been a few marriages I’ve seen survive all the way and 1 of those was simply because one person decided to zone out and pretend the bad didn’t exist. The one I saw the most of, we’ll call them Fred and Wilma was amazing. They lived together, worked together, laughed together and played together. Fred and Wilma had there struggles I’m sure but in the end (Fred past away a few years back) they loved each other and it showed. If I ever have the pleasure of a son I’ll likely name him after either Fred or Fred’s youngest son, they have been an amazing blessing to me over the years.
As I am simply writing things as they come to me I sit here thinking that some have asked me to tell them what all I have done and others have said I should write a book about my life. So I guess I’ll try to make a list of what I’ve done, work, sports and life in general. Here goes the quick fire list;
Golf(currently 5 handicap), rock-climbing (traditional 5.11’s, sport 5.12’s and bouldering in the v5 range) hiking up to 35 miles in a day, camping, hunting, fishing these are easy as most have seen the involvement there. Wrestling, basketball, football, rugby, ice skating (never got to play hockey which I regret) scuba-diving, surfing, boogey boarding, knee boarding, wakeboarding, water skiing, snow skiing, snowboarding, I shoot pistol, rifle, shotgun, traditional recurve and compound archery with fingers and a release. I’ve successfully hunted black bear, guided a friend for brown bear on Kodiak Island in Alaska, Roosevelt elk in Oregon and Rocky Mtn elk in Washington, whitetail deer, mule and black-tail deer, coyote, rabbit, raccoon. I’ve played soccer, volleyball (2 man beach and 6 man team) karate, mma, tennis, ping-pong, sea kayaking, white water rafting, jet-skiing, tubing is a given , 9 ball and 8 ball leagues and tourneys,
I have done some construction over the years, rewired a couple houses, framing, concrete, masonry plumbing, lots of roofs from cedar shakes, and metal to flat tar welded roofs and more sheetrock then anyone should have to do. Egress windows are my new specialty, jackhammers and concrete saws, no problem. I’m not a fan I’ve pavers for a driveway but if you need a new fence just tell me what kind and how high what a pain. I’ve built a few rock-climbing walls which are a blast, creativity at it’s finest! I’ve worked fast food, and been on banquet staff’s preparing food and folding napkins, serving and clean up. I been a lot attendant and valet, worked security, gave pool lessons and lawn care/tree trimming. Was hired as a snowboard instructor the week before I destroyed my knee and ended up as a caddy instead. I’ve cut fish for a packaging plant, been a personal trainer and gym manager, youth pastor, activities director, coach (football, wrestling, golf, volleyball). I’ve given climbing lessons, snowboarding lessons and taught who knows how many to water ski. I sold cars then worked at Sportmans Warehouse for a few years starting as an archery dept grunt, moving to the gun counter then to management with a move to Alaska which I fell in love with. Managed the archery dept in Spokane then went to Salem OR (not my fav place on the planet) to clean up a messed up hunting dept and get it running smoothly again before I went to work for Aluminum Chambered Boats a company my dad started about 11 years ago now. My job title there changed weekly if not daily to include; project manager, professional photographer/videographer, US Marine BEB Mark II operations instructor, warranty coordinator, customer liaison, product improvement director and so on. Then I went to China as a missionary and since have began trying to start my own business to accomplish the dreams that God has given me instead of working for everyone else.
On to life in general… haha I have hunted in Alaska, Washington, Idaho and New York. I have been rock climbing in California, Arizona, Idaho, Colorado, Hawaii, Washington, Alaska, Oregon, New York, Montana, China and Thailand. I grew up living with my mom and visiting my dad on the weekends which usually ended up being my step mom and siblings as my dad worked most Saturdays. I did a lot of fishing while I was there and learned to love the water. I would swim a ton but could watch the fish swim around my bait and keep a line in the water for hours. I remember our trips to the lake like the time I got motion sickness (which Brian still teases me about) and the 7.5 lb tinch ( pretty much a fish that looks like a giant worm, really a type of carp though). I remember going to Sprague lake and looking for my grandpa or just fishing from the high banks if we weren’t sure where he was, cause he was usually there. I remember Amy wearing her snowsuit to go hunting and I’m sure every deer in the area was trying to figure out what that bright loud thing in the woods was. I remember getting in trouble for not wanting to eat a hot dog and being spanked when it made me throw up and for not liking my step moms jell-o with the chunks of banana in it (Jell-o was meant to be good, not healthy). I remember the day I heard Kris tell the youth pastor from their church she and I hated each other it was a mutual understanding and am thankful for how far God has brought us since then. I remember getting in trouble for things I didn’t do and for things that were an accident. I guess I wonder if dad was hard on me cause he thought I didn’t like my half sisters. Again, big trouble if we called them step-sisters.
A 4 month pause…..
how to build a castle...
The first thing one must decide when building a castle. What is the purpose, which typically but not always has the same answer. Protection/security/safety are usually the reasons with other possibilities being arrogance or show, position and community standing.
I am going to discuss the primary concern of safety/security. Basic stone structure will do the job. Castle walls were often as much as 40 ft high and 20 ft thick. I think this will do just dandy. Add some towers at the corners and center of each wall. This will be for prisoners, secure food/supply storage, lookout hides as well as attack/archer positions. All to add to the security in case of a siege. For the gate we could take advantage of modern technology and build a concrete slider :-) but since we used stone for the walls instead of steal (maybe a bad idea) we'll stick with a heavy wooden gate. Wait just a minute. My castle is for the sole purpose of keeping other out. So if anything at all, a small secret passage may be just what we need. Let's say a gate in the water of the creek flowing thru. Easily hidden and defended if found but still allowing access to the outside world.
Now the structure is secure but we are not done. Back the castle up to the some large cliffs to add protection on that side and dig a moat around the rest. rather than water fill that trench with crude and make sure there is always one torch lit on the towers with archers. Now clear the forest well beyond the range of archers and catapults so the enemy has to walk into the open to even attempt an an assault.
With all of this in place, make peace with your neighbors before you close yourself in. If you are not a threat then there is no reason for an attack
Now to make this relevant. Purpose, protecting my heart.
Working backward now I have found this to be true. My female friends that I often call "sis" have never been a threat so call them all sis. It disarms them and shows I have no intentions toward them for any reason. A good start. Clearing the path requires some strategy along the way which I am still working out. I'd start by simply making known the pain, regret and mistakes of the past. The crude is easy. It is the hurt still carried within. They don't want someone with "baggage"! After all of this, if they get to the walls, you must be very careful.
The walls are in fact easier to get past. They must truly be strong and stubborn. There must be no give and have nothing to grab hold of that can be climbed. They must remain "sis" on your lips and in your heart and mind. They can not have that piece of you. No hanging out alone and keep your distance in groups. Whatever you do NEVER share your heart or show too much interest in theirs. For when you do the battle is lost and destruction will undoubtedly follow right on it's heals.
There is so little left I dare not risk it. To have nothing at all would surely mean the end. This I can not risk for the sake of those who hold position within these walls I build. May they ever grow higher and stronger.
Friday, October 29, 2010
another brilliant idea, or... is it
A little history on me and ideas and maybe just maybe, where I get it.
(Enters my grandpa, Phil)
Now here is a man of ideas. Some way before his time and some way out there. A 90 year old man with a memory better than most anyone I have ever met and a mind as sharp as a tack. Decades ago he had an idea for an alarm that talked to you or a motor that didn't need gas. These things are normal to us now and beyond any of my ideas for sure.
Most of my ideas have come from years of experience in the woods. How about a tree-stand that wraps around the tree half way or a shirt made out of camouflage see thru mesh for early season. Both of these are or have been in all of our outdoor sporting goods stores in the last 6-8 years. I've used both for about 13-14.
Well now I have a new idea. It came about a month or so ago and I have begun building it. This time if it works, there will be more than one or two. I know a few people in "high places" so to speak and I intend to see how far this one will go. I was sewing last night in an attempt to hand make the first pieces of this project. It will not be for everyone, but for those who are serious about getting off the trail. For those who wear out boots not the tires on their 4 wheelers. Those who want to go where most won't, to be where animals are and other hunters are not.
I actually have a couple of ideas but first things first right... and no, I'm not going to tell you, that would just be silly.
If you would, join me in prayer. Not that the idea would be successful but that God would be glorified in me whether the ideas work and make money or fall apart in the first trial. That at the end of it all I would be the one who used the talents the Lord gave me for His glory.
Saturday, October 23, 2010
somewhere in Pend O'Reille County
Dave K, a good friend, and I went hunting today. With a short 5 hours of sleep, an hour drive, hour motorcycle ride and 20 minute walk started the day. We found a spot overlooking a valley with a good mix of cover and openings. A good place to spot deer moving thru and an even better place for them to disappear.
The wind picked up shortly after getting to the ridge we would glass from. Followed by fog and rain. Then snow, higher winds and more fog. Spotting deer in a valley below is not an easy task when the fog level is somewhere in between you and the valley floor. After what seemed like too long I spotted a deer. About 300 yards away browsing slowly toward his eventual resting place. The deers head was behind a tree so I just watched. After a few short moments he turned his head to reveal a decent set of antlers that were most likely legal. (All mule deer must be at least 3 points on one side). I set down my binoculars and reached back for my spotting scope. Immediately I realized I had just made a mistake. I did not mark the location of the deer. You see last weekend I was hunting with my cousin around wheat fields. Spotting deer is not as easy as one might think there. However, once you do they are easy to find again. This valley however provided plenty of places for said deer to become invisible to the human eye, namely me. We glassed and glassed and eventually still hunted thru the valley, never to see that deer again.
the ride down was less eventful than the ride up, when Dave bailed and cracked his cranium, but extremely cold. We were both wet and it just doesn't require enough energy riding a bike down a mountain in neutral to keep a guy warm. As we finally arrived at the car an hour later we were both quite thankful for the simple things in life. Like a car with heat.
had a blast Dave, hope it isn't 14 years before we do it again.
Saturday, October 16, 2010
opening day
Saturday, 16 October 2010. Opening day of modern firearm deer season in Washington State. I was the tag along camera guy and an extra set of eyes for my cousin and her aunt today. We were hunting mostly in and around wheat fields for Mule deer though some whitetails were seen as well. We saw a lot of deer but the hunting was very different than what I'm used to. We covered a lot fo ground and used our glasses a ton. Though it was quite cold we never really felt it from the inside of the Jeep which explains the covering lots of ground and being very different than what I'm used to. I can not however argue with the simple fact that we saw a lot of deer including a couple of nice bucks. One of which jumped up about 30 yards from the truck as we were busy spotting deer a few hundred yards away. He was wide and tall with plenty of tines. The unit is 3 point minimum. When my cous got out of the rig she couldn't make out the number of tines because it was going straight away so she never shot. The back of the head is not the preferred spot to shoot if you want it on your wall anyhow. So, hopefully he'll be back in the area in the am. Though no shots were fired, at deer, it was a fun day and I look forward to doing it again.
I clarified no shots at deer because we did fling some lead at coyotes. One that was running full speed across the field in front of us. The second one which I unloaded on was calmly walking by at about 750 yards when my first round hit the dirt just behind him. Over the next 700 yards I let 5 more shots go. The last of which, at about a mile away, was no more than a foot or so from him. Guessing the holdover at approx 1500 yards with a 223 that's sighted in at 2oo is fun but not so easy! I'm thinking that might be a fun spot to check out again tomorrow :-)
oh, and for anyone keeping track, I did sleep about 5 hours last night! Praise the Lord
I clarified no shots at deer because we did fling some lead at coyotes. One that was running full speed across the field in front of us. The second one which I unloaded on was calmly walking by at about 750 yards when my first round hit the dirt just behind him. Over the next 700 yards I let 5 more shots go. The last of which, at about a mile away, was no more than a foot or so from him. Guessing the holdover at approx 1500 yards with a 223 that's sighted in at 2oo is fun but not so easy! I'm thinking that might be a fun spot to check out again tomorrow :-)
oh, and for anyone keeping track, I did sleep about 5 hours last night! Praise the Lord
Friday, October 15, 2010
thoughts of an insomniac
Once again I lay here unable to sleep. It's nearly 4 am. Usually I just lay awake wishing I could sleep, maybe something good will come of all this writing since I've decided to try and do something with all these extra hours :-)
So I started a new blog page tonight. I have the title and know where it is going. However, I am afraid that the title of what I want to write first will throw some folks off so here I am. Leaving it for now until I can figure out where to begin.... then I'll come back to the other subject muahhahaha
Today my uncle Doug and I drove to Clackamas, OR. This is about 375 miles from Spokane Valley where we started. We picked up a pretty cool 99 Suburban that has some motor troubles. Uh, then we had to drive back... \-: >zzzzz I should be exhausted, and kind of am. However, when I close my eyes my mind begins to race and won't let me sleep. I'm so tired I'm laying here laughing at myself for the crooked grinned sleeping guy I just made a few sentences back(in case you didn't get that).
Overall it was a good trip. Getting to know this side of my family has been a lot of fun. I'm learning a lot about life in general and not just them. It is interesting for me to be spending a lot of time with my dad's brother. They are a lot alike in some ways and nothing at all in others. We left Spokane around 1230 after several stops in which someone was unable to stop talking when we should have been driving. We finally got food and hit the road. I kept having to remind him that a goose-neck doesn't turn the same as a normal trailer and you have to swing it really wide on the corners. Or you hit things, like people standing on the sidewalk for example.
Loading the burb on the trailer was fun as usual. We tried the old roll it down the hill and hope you can stop in time method. Brilliant idea, poor execution! This time we came up short, again. Thank goodness the guy helping had a Bobcat and a tow strap. He was sure it wouldn't work but I just said maybe not and hooked the strap up anyhow. It worked like a charm though we thought we had a runaway truck for a bout 5 seconds as the whole shooting match slid about 10 feet. Truck, trailer and the burb all slid and nobody was in the truck. Note to self, NOT A GOOD IDEA. It all worked out in the end and we hit the road home. After about 5 and a half hours and a quick stop at Sprague Lake we were nearly home.... and nearly out of diesel as well. Ya know the on-board computers that tell you how many miles left on the amount of fuel you have. It has been stuck on 0 for about 2 miles when we coasted thru a stop sign and into the Petro station between Cheney and Spokane. Should a stopped in Ritzville haha. But God was good to us and we made it home about 230am, ish.
Ha, I got it. Off to my new blog, see you there.
So I started a new blog page tonight. I have the title and know where it is going. However, I am afraid that the title of what I want to write first will throw some folks off so here I am. Leaving it for now until I can figure out where to begin.... then I'll come back to the other subject muahhahaha
Today my uncle Doug and I drove to Clackamas, OR. This is about 375 miles from Spokane Valley where we started. We picked up a pretty cool 99 Suburban that has some motor troubles. Uh, then we had to drive back... \-: >zzzzz I should be exhausted, and kind of am. However, when I close my eyes my mind begins to race and won't let me sleep. I'm so tired I'm laying here laughing at myself for the crooked grinned sleeping guy I just made a few sentences back(in case you didn't get that).
Overall it was a good trip. Getting to know this side of my family has been a lot of fun. I'm learning a lot about life in general and not just them. It is interesting for me to be spending a lot of time with my dad's brother. They are a lot alike in some ways and nothing at all in others. We left Spokane around 1230 after several stops in which someone was unable to stop talking when we should have been driving. We finally got food and hit the road. I kept having to remind him that a goose-neck doesn't turn the same as a normal trailer and you have to swing it really wide on the corners. Or you hit things, like people standing on the sidewalk for example.
Loading the burb on the trailer was fun as usual. We tried the old roll it down the hill and hope you can stop in time method. Brilliant idea, poor execution! This time we came up short, again. Thank goodness the guy helping had a Bobcat and a tow strap. He was sure it wouldn't work but I just said maybe not and hooked the strap up anyhow. It worked like a charm though we thought we had a runaway truck for a bout 5 seconds as the whole shooting match slid about 10 feet. Truck, trailer and the burb all slid and nobody was in the truck. Note to self, NOT A GOOD IDEA. It all worked out in the end and we hit the road home. After about 5 and a half hours and a quick stop at Sprague Lake we were nearly home.... and nearly out of diesel as well. Ya know the on-board computers that tell you how many miles left on the amount of fuel you have. It has been stuck on 0 for about 2 miles when we coasted thru a stop sign and into the Petro station between Cheney and Spokane. Should a stopped in Ritzville haha. But God was good to us and we made it home about 230am, ish.
Ha, I got it. Off to my new blog, see you there.
Thursday, October 14, 2010
the things I love, have loved, have lost or given up
First and foremost I am a Christian. Which in and of itself should tell you a list of things I love. This is not where I am going tonight. I just mean the things in life, like pizza and rock climbing.
So here we go again and hey, who doesn't like pizza. Now rock-climbing.. some do and some don't. Golf is something I loved but have given up. You see going from a low-to-no handicap (means I was good) to be your average weekend hack (not so good) was not fun for me. So, I sent my clubs a packin. Though I think about it on occasion, so far it really hasn't bothered me. You see I think part of me hung on because each time I played well there was a glimmer of hope for what once was and could have been. I don't claim any favorite teams but just hope I get to see a few good games over a given season. At least for football and hockey as that's all I watch. Snowboarding is long gone though the memories stand strong as a reminder of what could have been and what is. I am thankful I can still walk! My fly-rods are gone along with my mtn bike and motorcycle. I am down to 3 guns, one each rifle, pistol and shotgun. I made dream climbing trip last year (Thailand DWS) and since I broke another finger this year, am seriously considering selling off my gear.
Hunting.... hunting has been a dilemma for me recently. You see I recently found out I much prefer hunting with, we'll say..., a best or good friend. Which rapidly brings me to what I think matters most here. All of this stuff... is really just that. None of it means a 'hill of beans' without someone to share it with. At least for me. Family and friends are where it's really at. God has placed those people in my life because I need them. I need them to sharpen me as a follower of Christ and to encourage me through the god and bad of life. I am not capable of pulling myself out of the holes I dig. I also am sure I fully need an ego check on occasion as well. Probably more often than I care to admit.
When I was in high school an aunt and uncle of mine moved to town along with there 4 kids, my cousins. I would show up on Sunday afternoon for a couple hours to say hello and make an appearance. I loved them so much but did not make them a priority. Several years later, I found myself laying alone in a king sized bed in Anchorage Alaska. My wife of 5 years had left me. I hiked when I wasn't working and drank when I wasn't hiking. All the while thinking over my life and all the things I had done and done wrong. I realized how much I had missed. What I had missed was the pursuit and growth of that which matters most in this life. relationships Relationships with my family that I now never get to see.
So what is the point of all this anyway....I'm working on that myself.
I think it comes down to this. I hate it broken relationships, whether friendships, families, marriages, whatever. I know sometimes there is nothing that can be done, but more often then not, probably 99.99999% of the time, there is. What is it? I really don't know but here are a few thoughts. Maybe it is as simple as setting down my pride or maybe even more likely is letting go of what I want. My own selfishness. I mean that is what drove me to not spend the time with my family when I had the chance in HS right.
a thought cometh.... So if I let go of what I want for the sake of another. Set aside my selfishness for the sake of another. WE gain relationship. Which from the beginning is what I really wanted anyway. That seems so simple yet it has has taken me so long to learn and I am not done, this I know.
I often wonder now. Am I a good friend? Am I selfish or am i able to put aside myself for others? If I am not able to I will never be a good friend and if not that then even less so a good husband and father.
I feel like such a selfish person. To anyone reading, friend or family, I ask your forgiveness for all the years I have spent for myself. I have done what I want when I want most of my life and I only hope that with the help of my Lord and savior I can change.
Phil 1:6-11
2Cor 6:16b-7:1
Oh for the day when we will fully know love! Lord come quickly
So here we go again and hey, who doesn't like pizza. Now rock-climbing.. some do and some don't. Golf is something I loved but have given up. You see going from a low-to-no handicap (means I was good) to be your average weekend hack (not so good) was not fun for me. So, I sent my clubs a packin. Though I think about it on occasion, so far it really hasn't bothered me. You see I think part of me hung on because each time I played well there was a glimmer of hope for what once was and could have been. I don't claim any favorite teams but just hope I get to see a few good games over a given season. At least for football and hockey as that's all I watch. Snowboarding is long gone though the memories stand strong as a reminder of what could have been and what is. I am thankful I can still walk! My fly-rods are gone along with my mtn bike and motorcycle. I am down to 3 guns, one each rifle, pistol and shotgun. I made dream climbing trip last year (Thailand DWS) and since I broke another finger this year, am seriously considering selling off my gear.
Hunting.... hunting has been a dilemma for me recently. You see I recently found out I much prefer hunting with, we'll say..., a best or good friend. Which rapidly brings me to what I think matters most here. All of this stuff... is really just that. None of it means a 'hill of beans' without someone to share it with. At least for me. Family and friends are where it's really at. God has placed those people in my life because I need them. I need them to sharpen me as a follower of Christ and to encourage me through the god and bad of life. I am not capable of pulling myself out of the holes I dig. I also am sure I fully need an ego check on occasion as well. Probably more often than I care to admit.
When I was in high school an aunt and uncle of mine moved to town along with there 4 kids, my cousins. I would show up on Sunday afternoon for a couple hours to say hello and make an appearance. I loved them so much but did not make them a priority. Several years later, I found myself laying alone in a king sized bed in Anchorage Alaska. My wife of 5 years had left me. I hiked when I wasn't working and drank when I wasn't hiking. All the while thinking over my life and all the things I had done and done wrong. I realized how much I had missed. What I had missed was the pursuit and growth of that which matters most in this life. relationships Relationships with my family that I now never get to see.
So what is the point of all this anyway....I'm working on that myself.
I think it comes down to this. I hate it broken relationships, whether friendships, families, marriages, whatever. I know sometimes there is nothing that can be done, but more often then not, probably 99.99999% of the time, there is. What is it? I really don't know but here are a few thoughts. Maybe it is as simple as setting down my pride or maybe even more likely is letting go of what I want. My own selfishness. I mean that is what drove me to not spend the time with my family when I had the chance in HS right.
a thought cometh.... So if I let go of what I want for the sake of another. Set aside my selfishness for the sake of another. WE gain relationship. Which from the beginning is what I really wanted anyway. That seems so simple yet it has has taken me so long to learn and I am not done, this I know.
I often wonder now. Am I a good friend? Am I selfish or am i able to put aside myself for others? If I am not able to I will never be a good friend and if not that then even less so a good husband and father.
I feel like such a selfish person. To anyone reading, friend or family, I ask your forgiveness for all the years I have spent for myself. I have done what I want when I want most of my life and I only hope that with the help of my Lord and savior I can change.
Phil 1:6-11
2Cor 6:16b-7:1
Oh for the day when we will fully know love! Lord come quickly
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
what is love
These are the thought processes, unedited, of a wandering soul. If not for the grace of God my life would be a complete loss. Stick with me if you dare..........your thoughts and comments are welcome and appreciated. Just be nice please!
"Love is a choice" they say. A choice made in the mind of a human. Not simply a feeling we get when we meet someone we like. It is a decision to stand by someone, to care for and to look out for their well being and what is best for them first.
The human mind is fickle, indecisive at best. One can make a decision to love but what happens when something new is added to the equation? We then assume the option to change our minds. However, if we make that assumption then our definition of love is ousted from the beginning. Which I for one do not believe. I think the assumption of the right to change our ind is selfish and unloving in and of itself. The only saving grace on this type of change is when it is made before there is a lifelong commitment made.
So I have a couple of questions. How does anyone make the decision to "love" someone else for the rest of their lives? I mean how can anyone really trust another person and know they aren't going to "change their decision" after that commitment is made? The divorce rate in our country is well over 50% and climbing. It is higher in the church than out, partly due to many non-Christians not getting married. So how do the 45% make it? How do they know? How do they chose to love and stick with that decision? What is the difference between the 45 and the 55%?
By the grace of God. May He give us wisdom. May He give us love that knows no bounds and the ability to continue to chose once we have made that decision. May His grace cover us and be the determining factor in revealing true love to all those around us.
Psalm 111:10
1 Cor 13:4-13
Titus 3:7
"Love is a choice" they say. A choice made in the mind of a human. Not simply a feeling we get when we meet someone we like. It is a decision to stand by someone, to care for and to look out for their well being and what is best for them first.
The human mind is fickle, indecisive at best. One can make a decision to love but what happens when something new is added to the equation? We then assume the option to change our minds. However, if we make that assumption then our definition of love is ousted from the beginning. Which I for one do not believe. I think the assumption of the right to change our ind is selfish and unloving in and of itself. The only saving grace on this type of change is when it is made before there is a lifelong commitment made.
So I have a couple of questions. How does anyone make the decision to "love" someone else for the rest of their lives? I mean how can anyone really trust another person and know they aren't going to "change their decision" after that commitment is made? The divorce rate in our country is well over 50% and climbing. It is higher in the church than out, partly due to many non-Christians not getting married. So how do the 45% make it? How do they know? How do they chose to love and stick with that decision? What is the difference between the 45 and the 55%?
By the grace of God. May He give us wisdom. May He give us love that knows no bounds and the ability to continue to chose once we have made that decision. May His grace cover us and be the determining factor in revealing true love to all those around us.
Psalm 111:10
1 Cor 13:4-13
Titus 3:7
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